Saturday, August 28, 2010

The list experiment

The list is something that holds all of the days tasks and jobs as I see need doing. The list isn't physical, it is mentally held in my head. The list is always changing and updating as the environment around me changes. If the children need something done, depending on the urgency, is where it fits into the list. The problem for me at the moment is I come at the bottom of the list. As the day progresses more and more things fill my invisible list and I never make it to the last task - which is me.

I have been learning a bit about self care and needing to take the time to do things for yourself. This is very challenging for me. Something inside me get anxious and nervous if I put me before doing what I see is on the list. I feel like I am cheating if I take time for me before the washing is done, or the lounge is tidy, or the dishes are put away. If I take the time to sit down before my list is complete all I do is sit there feeling guilty about the things I should be doing or the time I am wasting that could be more efficiently used.

But my challenge is to put me near the top of the list and learn to overcome the bad feelings I associate with this. So for a week my goal is to do something for myself, leaving something else that is on the list aside. I know that just thinking about this makes me worry as I feel the nerves build. But unless I make myself a priority I won't have the time to take a mental break towards wellness and other people will also expect that I will always put them first. Sometimes it is important to do things for other people but I am learning it should never be at the expense of your own well being.

So today I did some yoga and Pilate's before I hung up the washing (yes I will admit that before I did take the time I had already put the washing on, done the dishes, tidied the lounge, given the kids breakfast) but it is a start right? I left the washing, and what do you know, the world didn't fall apart. The washing was still waiting for me when I finished.

So this afternoon I once again took some time for myself to test the theory again (that the world wouldn't end if I did something for me without completing my mental list). I took some time to do some scrapbooking for Monkey number 3. I completed his birth page and his first month - so another two things off my scrapbook list but not off my household chores.

It is now time to start feeding time at the zoo, followed by bath and bedtime. But before I started I wanted to let you know about my experiment and let you know I would love to keep you up-to-date over the week that follows. I am also challenging you to look at where you put yourself and to take some time for self care over the next week with me.


  1. So true - great post... I too find it hard to make time for myself when I have a massive list of things to do! But it's so important!

  2. Love your pages for Monkey 3! The mental list is so hard to "put down", isn't it. Funny how everything is more important than taking care of ourselves, even though if we get run down everything else falls apart!

  3. Yeah no one ever died because a house wasn't tidy enough....ok someone might have tripped over something but you get what i mean...

  4. Hi Jess
    this is my first visit to your blog and already I am hooked! I can relate to what you are saying, especially about the pnd and being a stay at home mum.. two things I have also struggled with.
    Cant wait to read more.

  5. Thank you all for your lovely comments. It really makes me feel like I have people to share with who generally interested and understand. Thanks for all the support :)

  6. Wow, I so get your list thing, my list keeps getting longer and I never have any me time, think I might need to take your challenge. Love your blog.

  7. Oh I so envy your home birth! what a beautiful experience.